The one unifying element is that after every interaction you feel emotionally drained, fatigued, and listless," explains author Martyn V. Don't play their games. Writer Todd Brison refers to this type as "shiny people"--they always look polished on the outside, but their real personality doesn't match their exterior. They don't want you to know them. They want you to know the filtered, curated, guarded version you see every day," he writes.
Who has time for that? Psychology enthusiast Marcus Geduld likewise cautions against wasting your time on "people who are rarely vulnerable. Max Lukominskyi, chief marketing officer at Slice Planner, has a fancy word for this personality flaw--ultracrepidarianism--but ladies, you probably just know the problem as mansplaining.
Whatever your gender, you definitely should avoid these people who feel entitled to dispense wisdom and advice on any subject, no matter whether they have the faintest idea what they're talking about. Amen to that. If someone needs to minimize your strengths and achievements to make themselves feel better , you don't need them in your life, a number of respondents caution.
Stay away from people who don't know "how to appreciate your hard work and can't rejoice in your accomplishments," suggests operations coordinator Anshul Sharma, for instance.
Ponce also warns readers away from "people who become envious at your success, good fortune, or positive attributes True friends are genuinely happy for your good fortune.
They don't try to diminish it with negative reactions or make you feel guilty for sharing your happiness. If you shun someone, you may view them as inferior to you, morally or intellectually. In such cases, shunning is evidence of pride and self-righteousness. When you shun someone you disagree with, you are unable to separate that person from their words or actions.
The alternative to shunning is to love people unconditionally, to treat them as you would want to be treated, even if you disagree with what they say or do.
But if that person is no danger to you, and is not rude to you, then there is no reason to shun them. Instead, be brave enough to tell them the truth about their behavior.
If you speak the right words, you could impact their life. Hello, Chris! Like Liked by 1 person. Like Like. You are commenting using your WordPress. You are commenting using your Google account.
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Skip to content Search for: Search Close. Close Menu. Notes Oxford Dictionaries , s. Interestingly, physical pain and social pain are experienced as the same in our brains. The silent treatment that relationship partners give each other is a form of shunning. Ancestral human groups had to protect themselves from other human groups and predators. The stronger and more united a human group was, the better it could protect itself.
Ancestral human groups were largely based on genetic relatedness or genetic similarity. Individuals were motivated to help those who were related to them because, by doing so, they were helping the reproductive success of their own genes. The simplest way to tell if an individual belonged to the group was by looking at their physical similarity to other group members. If someone looked too different, they were probably from another, genetically unrelated tribe.
They were an outgroup. And human groups had to protect themselves from outgroups. The same thing happens today at so many levels. Racism and nationalism being glaring examples. Physical similarity is just one among many similarity criteria that hold groups together. Groups that live together also had to be psychologically similar. They had to share the same beliefs, values, norms, and traditions.
In this scenario, shunning can be used as a means of social control. The person being shunned is effectively being told:. At worst, they may be subjected to acts of violence. A lot depends on what part of the world you live in. In the not so free countries, social exclusion can have dangerous consequences.
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